Divorce & Re-marriage Questions & Answers The Rev'd. Fr., Dr. Theodore Stylianopoulos

Q. What is the Orthodox position on the indissolubility of marriage,
of divorce and remarriage, and why?

A: The Orthodox Church views marriage as a holy union between a man and a woman that is established and blessed by God. Marriage therefore is "a bond of a covenant that may not be broken," according to the words of the sacrament. And yet the Church, for certain grave reasons, permits divorce and remarriage. This seemingly paradoxical position arises out of, on the one hand, respect for biblical teaching and, on the other, compassionate concern for human weakness.
The authority for the unbreakable character of marriage is Christ himself. In Mark 10:6-8, Jesus rejects divorce allowed by the Mosaic Law (Dt 24-14) and appeals to God's order of creation: "God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh" (Gn 1:27; 2:24). Then he commands: "What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder" (Mk 10:9). The same teaching is found among the radical standards of conduct proclaimed in the Sermon on the Mount (Mt 5:31-33). These principles are intended for all those who accept Christ's saving message and commit themselves to live by the reality of God's kingdom revealed by Christ.

The Orthodox tradition has always fostered the ideal of the permanency of marriage on the basis of Christ's teaching. For example, the great Church Father, John Chrysostom (fourth century), writes, "Both by the manner of creation and by the manner of [new] lawgiving, Christ showed that one man must dwell with one woman continually and never break off from her." In his book "Against Remarriage," Chrysostom goes as far as to counsel widows and widowers themselves not to remarry but to remain faithful to their deceased spouses and honor their memory.

However, because of human frailty, not all people can uphold the ideal of the permanency of marriage. And the radical principles of the Sermon on the Mount must ultimately be interpreted in the light of the Gospel, not law. In cases of moral failure, the Gospel requires that we respond to people with compassion and forgiveness, not judgment and condemnation. According to the Gospel of Matthew, divorce can occur for reasons of "unchastity" (porneia, literally "fornication"), probably referring to sexual misconduct (Mt 5:32; 19:9). Similarly, though St. Paul mentions the standard of Christ's strict teaching about marriage, nevertheless he accommodates his pastoral instructions to human weakness, including the possibility of separation and divorce (1 Cor 7:10-15).

In this spirit, the Orthodox Church has developed the principle of "economy" ( oikonomia, meaning "flexibility"), by which it permits divorce and subsequent remarriage. But it does so only in the context of individual pastoral guidance, and for grave reasons such as abandonment, permanent insanity, adultery, forcing the spouse into prostitution, or endangering the life of the spouse. In such cases, it is not that the Church "dissolves" a marriage by granting a divorce, but rather that the Church officially acknowledges and certifies that a marriage has already tragically failed. To quote St. Cyril of Alexandria (fifth century), "It is not a writ of divorce that dissolves marriage before God, but bad actions." The Church acts by God's mercy to recognize the failed marriage and to allow the possibility of another in order to forestall worse moral consequences.

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